hmmmmm
coda is over
feels okay . screwed up but i feel okay .
doesnt really matter to me i guess i dono why
but today was quite fun anyway (:
more or less / give and take yea
ah welll

actually i have nothign to say haha .
im just trying to push entries down

haha today i was REALLY UGLY
its okay . sigh . hahaha
am i really cross eyed ?!?!

hmm i feel weird .
weird weird weird .

hahaahahaha . ridiculous .
charlotte tang plsplsplspls nv ever forget the feeling .
nv ever forget how it hurts
& how it made you feel .
& how its all stupid
& how you will only feel sad .
i'm crazy .
who would ever want to go through all that again .
RIDICULOUS

hello loves

yest started off bad ended off good !
watchd narnia which is not bad .
more kiddy versh of lotr
haha .

ok christmas coming !
have fun kiddos , dont eat too much ..
speaking of which i have been eating ALOT OF ICE CREAM
crazyyyyy amounts

sam if you see this I MISS YOU LIKE SHIT
haha i kind of miss all the rgssb ppl
saw shuwen on the train that day not bad (:
i feel so old hahaha
but not really taht old .
i dono !!

ling i miss you .
my goal is to write everywhere that i miss you while you're gone for 5 days hahahaha
BLAZER
i want to go yr house and slack like we did during promos hahaha
priorities

i have a secret
I GOT OASIS TICKETS
ling you want to go anot i forgot to ask you cause you're not around heh

mmmmmm
i wanted to say smth
but christmas shopping calls
and my memory is failing

your poor poor gf SIGH . hahaha

love actually is so nice (:












actually i like the next scene muchmuchmuch X 39428791827304 more .
the wasted heart will love you thing
but i cant find the photo
and im running late
bye kiddos !

my mum is watching an indian show .
hmm
think i'll join her later

white chicks is super funy !!!
hahahah i watchd on dvd last night . so damn funny
omgosh

i miss somebody i tiny little bit now and im waiting a tiny little bit now
crazy la .

actually i'm always forever waiting for my sis
to come home
to go sleep
quite sweet right , come to think of it
ahahhahahaa .




















or





















both fit me (:

haha why am i blogging so much . well i have smth to say

when you're falling in love , you spend almost half yr time waiting
when you're in love , you spend all yr time waiting

hahaa this is w reference to my observations with regards to a very good friend of mine ;)
you know i'm talking bout you ! don do the weird giggle okay . eeeyer

i havent been waitingggggg

you know how girls always think going for a hair cut is a solution to all yr problems in life ?

well i just went for a hair cut .
and i cut a fringe again
haha some ppl nv learn right .
nvm , its okay .
hair grows . eventually (:

monty, a muse appears in shanghai with a mission . he yearns for a taste of genuine human emotions and puts himself out as a beacon for lost souls, drowning in the bitter sea of love

okay time to do the 5 random things thing . if i got tagged by 2 ppl do i have to do 25 times ? or 10 times ? or 5 times ? ahh nvm . i shall be lazy .

1. when i concentrate on smth i tend to stare at it from the corner of my eye .
2. i use my special set of cutlery at home and i dont like my family touching it
3. my parents speak reallyreally sparse chinese that sounds weird but my chinese is good ! (:
4. i like holding hands w ppl when i sleep
5. when i get marks on my skin from leaning against an edge for too long i like to try and split it so it becomes a cut .

wah i really started running out of things to say at no. 3 hahahah .
christmas is coming .. i feel empty .

perhaps love was good ! company was even better (:
i loved the ending . and how the only person who came out happy was the one who nv really loved and thus could let go much more easily . show is pretty realistic actually . and super sad ): feel abit like watching it again .

christmas is the time to watch love actually ..

i think im essentially a selfish person . my reso for 2006 is to be a better person for ppl around me and myself .. sweeter , kinder , whatever i think makes a good person . and of course happier too ! (:

its not blood red its nj tie red .
nj tie is really RED .

i can i will i must improve myself in all aspects . be it in terms of r/s w family and friends , studies , band , personal improvement , whatever it is . this is a promise i make to myself (:
usual pinky finger thing included .

band fest pracs are over ... not bad pretty okay i like the songs alot acutally .. they feel so rgssb . overall quite fun la . in the weirdest way i talked more to rjband ppl this week . hahah . of course i dint make new friends , not really unexpected . i miss LING . omg . hahha

ok i thoughti had alot to blog about . but . I DONT . so weird .

everyone who should come back come back quickly !! i miss my clique . i am actually starting to miss school abit . hahah and i have NOT DONE ANY HW omgosh . im damn scared . ithought i was gona study alot in the hols but obviously i dint study at all .

my maid is back !!! yay . no more smelly clothes and EVERYTHING . im so sick of ironing and cleaning and packing and not eating . hahaha . i know im one lazy ass okay .

eh maybe i really need braces i have been staring at my lower row of teeth alot since last night . hhahah . demmit .

i'm not a kid >:/

where did my passion go ? i used to love rgssb so much . for everything . laughter , scoldings , ridiculous wasting of time , tears , etc . but now its just really lost its meaning . sry to any rj band ppl i may offend or have offended . i dont feel it anymore . but it doesnt matter to me anymore . i guess . where's my passion where's my passion . sigh .

happy birthday to me !
long story cut short ,

thanks :
GABBAG , VIV , SUV , everyone who msged me and sent well wishes and everything !! every single one thank you (: (:
got alot of ppl to thank la
brid : thanks for the shirt and flower !!
ling ching : thanks for the informative book hahaha . WHY MEN HAVE NIPPLES
brid ling ching : saturday ! thanks (:
viv : thanks for today !! wildwildwet is really super fun !! thank youuuuu sosososo much (:
kiat hk : super nice bday card hor xiexie (: (: but why does it say colourful sounds like im gay . dont expose my secret leh hoho .
family : everythign
zit ching : coming to surprise me !!! with operation kenny but failing so super ly hahahaha . thansk still !!

ok i sound really too happy in this entry already . i need to stop before i sound mad . hahaha bye ppl .

take a chance and do what you feel says:
my theory is right
take a chance and do what you feel says:
u actuallylive in the hole in the magical mountain next to me right???
take a chance and do what you feel says:
no wonder everyday i seelittleclothes laid out to dry
take a chance and do what you feel says:
and sometimesflyers of ugly half naked guys happen tofly by my cave


HELLO WANGSANAGARA BOSCO IS A HOT HALF NAKED GUY DEMMIT hahaha . little clothes .

lately i've been evaluating ( for the lack of a better word ) my life and character too much for my own good . i'm sure this is not one of my depressed or angsty moods because i believe i have matured out of that . in one way or another . in the weirdest way , the fact that i feel much more nonchalant about everything thats going on around me than i would in the past kind of consoles me . at least i'm not breaking down into more of a pathetic mess than i already am right . hahaha .

past year has been quite a mental torture , to say the least , not only for me of course but those close to me (family, gabbag) and its just weird that so many bad things can happen in one year . maybe we've just all matured and have started looking at things from a different point of view . but the fact that i do manage to get out of every shitty situation thrown at me eventually is something that deserves mention right ? i guess .

what i've learnt is to not have any expectations out of anyone or any relationship and not set myself up for heartbreak . and this really applies to every part of our lives in all senses . hai basically if you're gona take something away from me , dont give it to me in the first place .

anyhows on my way home i received an sms from one of the most unexpected ppl saying some of the most unexpected things . its more or less an open secret but of course nobody likes to point it out or talk bout it unless you're really close ( eg tissue paper on the bottom of your shoe hohoho ) but it really started me thinking , because in the first place . the blame is no one's to bear . we should have tried to bond the whole batch and made friends with everyone and get to know each other better but in the first place, it takes two hands to clap . for you to point it out must mean that you notice it too so maybe you should have approached us ? i am in no way putting the blame on anyone cus i know its everyone's to bear im just trying to look at it in an objective way and i know you prob dint target it at just one person but more of everyone .. obviously thigns could have been better with more bonding and all that but seriosuly not to be cynical , who really is looking for lifelong friends at this stage of our lives . im assuming that we are all mature enough as of now to discern who is really your friend and who is not . over the years i guess you have filtered out all the fairweather friends and who will really be there for you . im not tryign to argue so pls dont get me wrong . if i were i would have replied immediately . so seriously , maybe you should give it some thought too

i'm starting to really hate this responsibility & it is honestly getting really tiring . but everyone is hurting inside too and i guess this is what unconditional love is really all about right . its really starting to fade though . whats unconditional ? dying for someone ? like ling said we would all save strangers from dying too . is that unconditional love ? well not really considering you dont even know the person . i guess i am trying to protect everyone by just bearing all this bullshit . but i can only take so much more before i really break down . and w/o anyone at the bottom to listen to all the bullshit , tolerate and clean up after everyone , everythign will break down .. but forget it . i will nv solve this problem fucking irritating arghhh . so everyone stop hurting already la . im already holding up all yr bullshit for you . just throw everything to me then throw me away . i really want to get out of this anyway ..

sigh . to everyone in gabbag who has been having a bad year , what goes around comes around next year we'll get all the good karma . we just have to .